It’s Not the Load That Breaks You; It’s the Way You Carry It!

Have you ever looked at someone and thought, “Wow, they’ve really got their life together”? Sometimes that’s true… but sometimes it’s nothing more than a polished mask, a smile stretched over a soul that’s barely hanging on.

For years, that was me.

I looked put-together, organized, polished, and “strong.” I carried myself like nothing bothered me. But the truth is, I was barely keeping myself from falling apart. So when I did something that didn’t match the image people saw—when I slipped, fell, or made a mistake—it shocked everyone. And let’s be honest… the judgments came fast.

The talk was juicy.

Calls were made.

Screenshots were shared.

Messages were sent—

but none of those messages were ever sent to me, only about me.

So yes, today—again—I look like I have it all together.

But here’s the difference:

It’s not a mask this time.

There’s no pretending.

There’s no hidden version of me shaking in the background trying to keep up the performance.

And I want to be very clear… It’s not because I don’t have problems. I absolutely do. I face challenges, unexpected moments, disappointments, triggers, emotions, and responsibilities just like anyone else.

But I’ve learned that it’s not the load that breaks you; it’s the way you carry it.

Today, I carry life differently.

I carry it with every principle I’ve written about in this blog.

I carry it with humility, honesty, and alignment.

I carry it with wisdom instead of pride.

And above all, I carry it with God.

Because I finally learned how to stop pretending, stop performing, and stop living a story that wasn’t even mine to write.

Here’s how I carry the load now:

1. I give God the weight that was never mine to carry.

Scripture tells us, “Cast all your anxieties on Him because He cares for you.” — 1 Peter 5:7

That’s not a suggestion.

That’s an invitation.

Every day, I release the need to control outcomes. I give God my worries before they snowball into fear. I surrender what I can’t fix and trust that He already has a plan.

2. I accept moments when I’m not at my best.

I’m not Wonder Woman.

I don’t need a cape.

And I don’t need to pretend to be okay when I’m not.

When I’m tired—I rest.

When I’m overwhelmed—I pause.

When I’m hurting—I acknowledge it.

This isn’t weakness… it’s wisdom.

3. I stop and think before reacting.

Life still throws curveballs. The unexpected still shows up unannounced. But now I don’t react out of emotion—I respond out of intention.

That “Stop, Think, Do” strategy shifted everything for me. It slows me down long enough to avoid self-sabotage and choose clarity over chaos.

4. I live intentionally—every single day.

I don’t drift anymore. I don’t float through life and hope things magically get better. I show up for my goals, my healing, my faith, and my future.

When you live intentionally, even small steps become powerful moves.

5. I show up for myself first.

This one took the longest to learn.

For most of my life I showed up for everyone else first—and I ended up empty, resentful, and exhausted.

Now, I fill my cup first.

I invest in my mental health, my spiritual health, and my emotional stability.

Because when I’m healthy, everything else in my life lines up.

6. I remind myself that EVERYONE needs support—yes, even the strong ones.

Society loves to separate people into two groups:

• those who need help

• and those who give help

But that’s not how life works.

We are both.

Those who help still need someone to talk to.

Those who encourage still need encouragement.

Those who pour out still need to be poured into.

Strength doesn’t mean you never need support—it means you know where to go to find it.

So what’s the real secret to carrying the load?

It’s knowing that you’re not carrying it alone.

It’s adjusting your grip, releasing what isn’t yours, and holding on to what does matter.

It’s refusing to wear a mask and choosing authenticity over appearance.

It’s giving yourself permission to be a human being—not a machine.

It’s trusting that God will take what you surrender and strengthen what you steward.

Because the truth is this:

Life doesn’t get lighter… but you get stronger when you learn how to carry it.

And you carry it best when God carries you.

Here’s a few Reflection Questions for you:

1. What “load” am I currently carrying that feels heavier than it should be? Is it mine to carry, or is it something I need to release to God?

2. Where in my life am I still wearing a mask? What am I afraid will happen if I show up as my real, authentic self?

3. How do I typically react when the unexpected happens? Do I pause and think, or do I respond out of emotion or old habits?

4. In what ways am I showing up for everyone else but not showing up for myself? What one shift can I make this week to prioritize my emotional, mental, or spiritual well-being?

5. Who helps me carry my load? Am I surrounding myself with people who lift me up—or weigh me down?

6. What would it look like for me to intentionally live each day instead of simply surviving it? What habits, routines, or boundaries do I need to strengthen?

Here’s my prayer for you:

Father in Heaven,

Thank You for being a God who sees every burden we carry—even the ones we don’t talk about, don’t understand, or don’t know how to release. Thank You for inviting us to cast all our anxieties on You, not because we are perfect, but because You care for us deeply and personally.

Lord, I lift up the person reading this right now. You know their struggles, their secret worries, their hidden exhaustion, and every weight sitting on their heart. I ask that You meet them right where they are and remind them that they do not have to carry life alone.

Teach them how to release what isn’t theirs, how to rest when they’re weary, and how to trust that Your strength is made perfect in their weakness. Give them courage to show up authentically, wisdom to pause before reacting, and peace to walk through each day with intention and grace.

Wrap Your arms around them and steady their steps. Let them feel Your presence, Your comfort, and Your overwhelming love. Strengthen their mind, guard their heart, and lighten their load.

In Jesus’ name,

Amen.